How good is 'soooo goood,' really?

"oh please... it's not THAT good....!"

Even though I find the process of learning Chinese quite tiresome and slow, I have to say that being and China and learning the language is kind of rewarding. Especially since the progress you make is so appreciated by locals.

In the beginning phase of learning Chinese, you absorb every single 'wow, your Chinese is so good-' comment you get from a local like a sponge. Even though you deliver the compulsory denial phrase: 'Oh, no no no... my Chinese is not good at aaaaalll!!!!!' you are secretly musing, thinking that 'hell yeah I am getting better! Even the locals are noticing!', forgetting about the fact that yesterday you ordered an apple juice and they gave you an orange.

But then, once you've spent some time learning, and some years in China, you notice that the whole 'ohhhh, your Chinese is really great!' isn't really about your Chinese being good or not. Rather, it is just a polite, break-the-ice phrase that people tell you when they notice that you can say more than '你好 Ni hao!' (hello) and '谢谢 Xie xie' (thank you).

A typical example of this is when having a chat with a taxi driver. The conversation more or less always follows the same pattern:

1. you tell him where you want to go, he ask you if he should take the highway.
2. You tell him no and suggests another route.
3. He tells you your Chinese is really great.
4. You politely decline the compliment by saying 那里那里-'Nali Nali' (=polite way of declining the compliment).
5. He tells you that really, your Chinese is fantastic.
6. You say '不敢当 -bu gandang!' (= you flatter me/I don't deserve your praise)
7. He cracks up, almost starts applauding and asks you where (such a smart) girl/ guy is from.
8. You tell him your country of origin.
9. He (normally) says something nice about your country/asks you something about your country, and then proceeds to asking how long you've been in China.
10. You answer. (the shorter you've been here the more impressed he will be seeing that your Chinese is 'soooo goood!')

Don't get me wrong. Sometimes it is really nice to have these conversations, especially when your 'learning-a-new-language-self-esteem' is low. Also, who doesn't love being told that their Chinese is good?! Yeah, that's what I mean. I've been that absorbing sponge. I still am on bad days.

But then comes that one day when you decide that you don't want to be told any more bullshit. When you've had it with nice words. When you want to hear the truth.

For me it happened during a foot massage the other day. I was sitting on a stool with my feet placed in a bucket of hot water and a massage guy rubbing my shoulders and neck behind me.

-How's the pressure? He asked in Chinese.
-It's OK. I said.
-Is the water too hot for you?
-No, the water is also OK. Actually, can you add some more hot water?
-Of course. And wow... your Chinese is really good!

(by this time the whole room was listening. Nothing out of the ordinary. Expect a large audience when you can speak Chinese and do it at a place where there are a lot of Chinese people)

-How do you know that my Chinese is good? I have barely spoken yet? Only answered your questions. 

TOUCHDOWN! You know that drum solo that they do in movies when someone says something really smart? Well, I was almost expecting that one. Because the whole room cracked up. 

-Yes, how can he tell, how can he tell?!? Came from an old lady getting her feet kneaded in the corner.

-Ah, what an intelligent lao wai! Said another woman.

Even the four other masseur guys were giggling although I could tell they were trying to hold it back.   

The only one who wasn't having a good time was the guy rubbing my shoulders.

-Well... Actually. I can just tell, that... you know.. that your Chinese is... well. I just know that you are good!!

Yeah, sure he did.

-Well, no no no.. I'm not.. 那里那里， 不敢当.... (And here we go again.)

Still, it was kind of refreshing to take a different approach rather than just being a sponge. I think I'll do that again sometime.