Friday, March 20, 2009

Homesick


I would lie if I said I felt motivated to blog today. Lately I’ve been so homesick and today (despite the sunshine outside my window and the fact that it’s Friday) the feeling is more intense than ever. There’s nothing wrong or unusual about with being homesick, I’ve been living abroad for the last eight years, and of course these feelings have caught up with me before. But this time the feeling has lingered for a while. It might have something to do with the fact that my sister just had a baby and I just wish I could have been there. I don’t know how many babies, puppies, weddings, and special days I’ve missed out on over the years, but obviously that’s the price you have to pay when you choose to live abroad.

I hope no one out there misinterpret this post: I feel happy and grateful that I live here in China and I don’t have anything big to complain about in life (I don't like to see myself as someone who complains about the most petty things), but I can still feel homesick right? It has nothing to do with feeling sorry for yourself –it is just a feeling that sometimes catches you and stay with you for a shorter/longer period of time, until you feel ready to shake it off, and start enjoying the fact that you are living abroad again. I’m not saying that it’s anything serious, gosh, no, I could just pack my bag and go home, it is not any harder than that. But of course I won’t. I've enjoyed 90% of the time I've spent here, so I just have to stick this 10% of homesickness out.  

So, I guess I will just plaster a big smile on my face, study the 89 new characters I have to learn today, write a home-work essay (that was due yesterday –whoops!), and hit the gym for a much-needed work-out session. That normally swifts my mood. I tried the whole ‘comfort food from Sweden’ thing yesterday (with copious amounts of chocolate) but it didn’t do the job (instead, it is one of the reason why my gym session is ‘much needed’ today… hehe!).

Anyways, I just wanted to explain why today’s blog post isn’t a quality one. See you tomorrow instead, have a good Friday!

I wish I could spend some time with....:
sisters
puppies
nature (clean air!!)
babies
pregnant friends
family

27 comments:

flowrgirl1 said...

I know how you feel. Im homesick often. Since i moved out of state all i can think about is what im missing out on at home. its hard but worth the experiences i suppose.

incognito said...

Awww.. there is nothing wrong with being homesick! There is no place like home after all...
But, Jonna, please look at the bright side that you are the one with the most memorable experiences, exciting adventures, and above all, wonderful friendship all over the world!

remember, the world revolves around you! hehe

Jonna Wibelius said...

Flowergirl1 -yeah, it is totally worth the experience! :)

Incognito -f course I do that, 90% of my time.. that's why I wrote in post too that I don't wanna come across as if I am complaining just coz I am feeling a bit homesick.. I know the pros (and cons) about living abroad... and I love most of the experience!

mantse said...

not a bad mood and this is natural..

The Casual Observer said...

Have you tried phoning a friend or two? VOIP or cheap phone cards, perhaps?

Or write a few letters/postcards?

Maybe that would make the homesickness worse, though.

Jonna Wibelius said...

Casual observer -hehe, I spent last Sunday on the phone to 4 different friends/family members. No, it doesn't make matters worse... it is actually quite nice. I think I will call 4 new ones this wknd :)

Steven said...

Hey, nothing wrong with feeling homesick. Comical though - you miss fresh air? How bad is the air quality where you live?

Diederik said...

Hi, have been following ur blog for a while now, but didn't feel the need to comment. But with your homesickness comming up it might be the right time to leave a comment.

Your blog is the only blog I read on a almost daily basis. After reading the news, its almost like my digital newspaper. For me the biggest reason why ur stories are interesting to read, is that they always have some things in it which I can recognise here in China. (I'm staying in Wuhu, not so far from Suzhou) The same is with the homesickness, although it doesn't bother me that much yet, since I'm not even in China for 2 months. It is a scary thought of what we are all missing back home if we stay abroad longer. But yep well that's live I guess...

So ur post of today is quite ok (even tho u r not that motivated!) and keep up the good work!!

Don Tai said...

Sorry you feel homesick. It'll pass. I know exactly how you feel, as I've felt the same many, many times. Do something to distract your mind. Eat something new and yummy.

flyingfish said...

To tell you the truth, Jonna, I think this IS a "quality post." Certainly you write with feeling about a topic that matters. What more could anyone ask?

And the photos are absolutely beautiful!

Besides, think how awful it would be if you were NOT homesick at times.

Jonna Wibelius said...

awww thanks u guys for ur nice comments. Makes me smile. I just got back from the gym, spent a good 1 hour and 15 min on the treadmill, sweated like a pig (!) although now I feel much better and I hope the homesickness wears off completely over this wknd. Happier posts to come! :)

Jonna Wibelius said...

steven -the air here is BAAAAAD... well no, terrible must be a better word?! I come from a small suburb in Sweden and have been spoiled with growing up while breathing fresh, clean air... so the polluted air and lack of nature here in Suzhou is actually something I find hard to deal with. But impossible to do something about it.

Chris said...

Hi Jonna, I know exactly how you feel too. Homesickness catches up with all of us at some point. It always seems to come around in waves. About a month ago I was also quite homesick, even got to the point where I was checking prices for plane tickets.

I hope you can get through it soon, I guess you know how to handle things like a pro by now. It always wears off after a while, and if it gets too bad taking a trip home really isn't such a difficult thing to do.

As for the comfort food, instead of chocolate, I went for cheese!

CD said...

I must say- There is NOOOO place like home...I haven't been home for years. That's probably one of the reason why Im on the net all the time- cos I chat with my friends and relatives on YM and SKype...though I love Scotland and people are very friendly, it's just the weather that puts me down sometimes...but sometimes I end up moaning because I am homesick!!! :-(

kanmuri said...

I sometimes feel homesick too. I haven't been back in Canada for a while and don't intend to go back for another year. It's crazy how the smallest things can trigger that feeling. Luckily, it usually passes ;) Hang in there.

Diane said...

Flyingfish tells it right! This is a quality post. You're not just a writer/blogger - you bring humanity to your writing and speak to issues that we all feel at some time or another. I think in this case being homesick tells of your inner character. You are homesick because you love and care about people and you are missing important milestones in their lives.

Everything in life is a choice, many times with exclusions. You know the saying, 'Closing one door opens another.'

Janosch said...

Well, i am still living in the country i was born and have these feelings of wanderlust sometimes.it is like your homesickness,just heading towards a different direction.hope i will be able to experience homesickness soon ;)

Loveanewidea said...

Hey, we're all entitled to a little less than perky every now and then :)

Hai you - 嗨呦 said...

Be happy for those homesick feelings. It is just a natural proof that you care for your loved ones at home. Even though it hurts a little.

See the bright sight of it. Wouldn't it be bad if hadn't those feelings? Many greetings from close to your home (DK) ;-)

Anna Davidson said...

I know how you feel Jonna, often get pangs of 'I miss home' here in Wuxi. Thank goodness for Skype is all I can say! Do something nice for yourself this weekend!

Brad F. said...

I spent 8 years in the US military. That kept me away from home quite a bit. Before that, my dad was in the US military, so we missed out on a lot of family events.

Now, I'm living abroad, so I'm still missing out on stuff. I don't mind that much though. I suppose it's hard to miss something you were never used to having in the first place. Besides, I've built up a nice life here with my wife. ^_^

Lover of Life said...

This blog was of the highest quality. It spoke to how you are able to be so far from home for such a long period of time. I think you are very very strong, and I admire you for taking a chance in life. Good for you.

Blank-Socrate said...

:)
you have a nice family
I hope you can visit them soooooon

Michael said...

Hi Jonna,

I just wanted to say I've been following your blog for a few weeks and it's always a really amazing read. I'm from the US, but I've been living in Germany for about a year now, and keeping up a blog like this much be an amazing amount of work, but you do it beautifully!

I know the homesick feeling! I always settle down for an evening with some old movies or pictures of friends at home and try to get it out of my system. Sometimes it works, sometimes not, but it's no good trying to ignore it.

OK, I really just wanted to comment so I didn't feel like a creep reading silently.. :D Good luck with your homesickness!

J said...

I have these moments too, espcially when I long for the open countryside and sea of my home. I hope some weekend skypeing has made you feel better. :)

胡崧 said...

The lack of nature in Suzhou? Really? Isnt it supposed to be one of the oldest and most ancient cities in China? I mean they have all the gorgeous gardens and stuffs like that.

Caitlyn said...

my mom always told me " there is no place like home."
But life is a bag of memories so enjoy where you are to the fullest.