Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Compliment or crush?

Whatever you do -as a girl- only pay attention to the guys

Sometimes, China’s just so funny. While western guys can receive an unlimited amount of compliments over here (from men as well as from women), there’s a clear line when it comes to women. The other day I went shopping with four Chinese girlfriends. We are not super close, but have known each other for some years still. They are all a bit younger than me, and especially one of them (her name is Luna) really likes me and the fact that I’m tall, blonde, and big-nosed.

We went into some shops and were all trying on clothes. I had one of those good (and rare) days when everything fits, and my dear friend Luna simply would not hold back on the compliments:

-Ah, Jonna, you look so great in everything you try on today!

-That’s perfect on you!

-You’ve got a great figure!

I was blushing/”nail-nali-ing”/”bu gandang-ing”/and so on (yeah, accepting a compliment is simply not my thing, especially not here in China) until one of the other Chinese girls decided she’d had enough:

-What’s the matter with you Luna, the way you speak to Jonna one would think you have a crush on her?!

-Come on… I’m just saying she looks good in this dress.

-No you’re not. I think you like her. 

-Yeah, I think you do! Another one filled in. You've been speaking to her as if you like her all day long!

(Yikes. Uncomfortable situation number ONE. Chinese girls are fighting over if one of them has a crush on me or not?! And all she did was paying me some compliments?)

-I don’t, come on.

-Well, so how come you don’t have a boyfriend.

-I have not found one I like.

-Well maybe you like girls. Maybe you have a big problem…

-Hahhaha, well well, shall we all go for lunch?!
(I decided it was time to step in and change the subject -and what better way to do so than distract them with lunch?).

However, the conversations continued over the food when Luna asked me if I wanted to try her salmon pasta (we were having a Wagas lunch).

-Seeeeeeeeee….. you totally like her!!! You've got a problem! You like girls!

Both me and Luna sighed.

Man! There’s no way to get a compliment over here, is there?


Anonymous said...

Haha, I love the way she refers to homosexuality as "big problem." That cracks me up.
What you should of done is just start complimenting her and see if she would start to accuse you of liking girls for being nice to her. XD

Brad Farless said...

Actually, it sounds to me like she might have a girl-crush on you.

Jonna Wibelius said...

Soap -I know, it cracks me up too. Strange to hear that in some ways, people over here are still not open at all.

Brad -really?! I thought she was just being nice!

Brad Farless said...

Well, maybe it's the culture, but everywhere I've been, offering to share ones plate of food with another person is a very personal thing. I know it's common here to get common dishes that sit in the middle of the table, but sharing from ones own plate is a bit different.

Careful Jonna! She might give you a 'friendly' kiss on the cheek next when no one's looking! ^_^

Pete In Syracuse said...

I think your friends were just sick and tired of her gushing or they were jealous she was monopolizing you attention! I mean if your going to go after somebody I guess you go for the throat. It's amazing how a little tongue can have such great power over the rest of the body. (One word can hurt quicker than a hit!)....I do like Soaps suggestion of complimenting her & see what would happen... :o)

Jonna Wibelius said...

Brad -haha, OK, I promise to watch out. She's so sweet though.

Pete -yeah u r right. One thing I think is weird is that it went from Luna being nice to me, to them being nasty to Luna (asking her why she doesn't have a boyfriend, what her problem is, and so on). Yeah next time I will pour compliments over her just to see their reactions.

yan+starla said...

If you start complimenting Luna, then they'll definitely see you two as a couple, then.