Friday, May 9, 2008

Tall, single taxi driver looking for a girlfriend

Quite a hilarious day yesterday in Shanghai. Around 5pm I caught a cab from Hongqiao to get to the inner city. I knew it was going to be a pain… 5pm = heavy traffic jam in Shanghai. …so I thought I would be a bit considerate and told the driver that he could drop me off anywhere he preferred. I got a nasty:

-It doesn’t matter where I drop u off at this time! The whole city is the same! Traffic jam, traffic jam, traffic jam! reply and a heavy sigh.

Oh lord, someone must been having a bad day? Well, I could tell from my backseat that the driver was definitely struggling in the front because he was too tall for the car! His head kept hitting the car ceiling so he had to sit with a hunched back and at times he leaned forward to stretch out a bit. It didn’t look comfortable at all.

-Long day, huh? I tried.
-Very, he replied. But my attempt was successful.
-So you speak Chinese… how long have u been here for….

And there we went. Perfect. We were chatting away about the usual things like where I was from and where he was from and what Shanghai was like (when u r learning a language, using it is very limited, but well.. good practice anyways) but then he suddenly asked.

-Do you have a boyfriend?
-What is he like? Does he treat you well?
-He’s………….. bla bla bla. And yes, he treats me well.
-Is he Chinese?
-Does he make you happy?
-If you didn’t have a boyfriend, would you then go out with me?
-I can’t answer that!
-Sure u can! Would you?
-I don’t know… Maybe not?
-So you would not be willing to date me. Is it because I am Chinese? U see, I think we would be good together. Especially because you are so tall. I am also very tall. I cannot find a girlfriend in Shanghai!
-But Chinese girls like tall men?!
-Well, I am 189. I don’t want to date someone who is 160 or 165. It is not comfortable for me! Dating you would be perfect. What do you say?
-I already have a boyfriend.
-Well we don’t have to tell him! Sometimes it is good to ‘switch partner’!

(Oh my lord was I cracking up or what at this stage? We were stuck in a traffic jam at Ya’an Lu for about 45 minutes so this conversation just went on and on!)

-Well I am not up for a partner switch!
-Well you know. If you would date me your Chinese would get really good. And if we would get married think how tall our son would be. I can study English to learn. You can help me. I already know ‘A B C D….’
-Sorry, I am not planning to get married?
-OH why not?! Your boyfriend doesn’t love you!
-He does?
-You sure?!
-Eh.. yes!
-How many times does he tell you he loves you?
-Well.. he tells me enough.
-If u were my wife I would tell u I love you once every day. That would be enough. Not too much and not too little….

And so it went, on and on… we also went through what my parents does for a living, if I am religious or not (he could not date me if I was deeply religious, he said ‘religion causes too much problem in this world’), how many sisters and brothers I have, what sports I like, what food I like, what food I can make, what foods he can make… And of course: an endless nagging about my phone number, or a future date. I was laughing all the time, telling him he was a good joker and so on… He really brought up his height issue all the time, saying no Chinese girl was tall enough for him. He was 32 and tired of being lonely. And his parents would be happy if he brought home a tall girl.

When I asked if he thought it was uncomfortable to drive the car (seeing he was too tall for the front seat) he said:

-Sure it is uncomfortable, I keep hitting my head. But I have been doing this for 6 years. You get used to it. You adapt.

When we approached my destination he wrote down his number on an old taxi receipt to me, “in case I change my mind or if my boyfriend changes his mind and finds another girl!” (!) and then it was pay time. The whole ride was 45 kuai.

-For you it’s free.
-Oh no it is not!
-Yes, really. I don’t want you to pay.
-No, I want to. Come on. It is 45 kuai! Let me pay!
-No no… it is free.

And then when I got out off the car, he also got out off the car?! (this was in the Shaanxi nan lu-Huaihai Zhong Lu crossing?!)

-Eh… goodbye then?! Thanks for the ride!
-Goodbye Jonna. I hope you will call me.

I think he wanted to hug me but I sort of didn’t investigate any further how true my thoughts were. So I walked away.

-See how tall I am! He yelled after me.

My lord..

I still don’t get it. Every Chinese girl I’ve met so far wants a tall boyfriend?! Jump into the taxis ladies and look for this fella. He’s single, tall, and keen!


StairWayToRich said...

^D^,it is funny~
You met a "情种"

Lullun said...

*haha* Ibland får man bara de knasigaste samtal i en taxi. Det var en av de värre jag hört! :-)